neha is a star

listening to a live version of "here comes the sun" on pandora. the crowd was silent during the actual song (i didn't believe it was live until the end), and it made me wonder if george preferred concerts where the audience listened attentively and then cheered loudly after a song was over or concerts where people just screamed the entire time and it was probably hard to actually hear the music. i wonder what paul mccartney is like in real life, whether he can be a normal humble guy, or whether that's even possible if every now and then you can remember that at one time half of the girls in the whole wide world were in love with you.

in my lifetime i have had two stars named after me. thanks to a really discouraging and disheartening article i read in 10th grade, i've known for awhile that there is nothing official or real about these names - the names these agencies assign are only recognized by the agency itself and not by the wider astronomical community. sometimes i wonder, though, if maybe both agencies picked the same star for my name, independently and 18 years apart, and maybe that star and i really are meant to be.

not quite sure what to do

i used to think of myself as a very patient person, but lately (as in over the past year or so) i've been getting fed up easier and have felt more like i'm tolerating certain people instead of enjoying them. it's not anyone specific, and it's never my closest friends, but what happened to slowing down and listening to people and appreciating what they have to say, even if it's not incredibly interesting, or they're taking too long to say it, or i've heard it before? what happened to walking slowly even though we could be walking faster, because it's more important to be with somebody than it is to get somewhere 10 minutes earlier and alone? i have discovered that i have this newfound drive for efficiency, and i don't like it.

i don't know what i'll end up doing with my life, but i do know that i'll need a job where there is air conditioning in the summer. i have been melting this week. ew.

i can tell that we are going to be friends

ok, done with that whiny nonsensical self pity! the interviews went pretty well, i didn't know what to expect but they didn't ask any ridiculous computer science questions, so that's good. we'll see! it's a really exciting program, and everyone i talked to today got me pretty excited about it. (in case you can't tell, it causes a lot of excitement.)

in other news, i keep finding more stuff i need to unpack and find a place for here at home. there is just not enough space here anymore! sadface.

in other news, bryanna got guitar hero! she also showed me how i could buy a used ps2 online so buying a guitar hero or rock band would only be +$80 instead of +$120. we'll see, but not until i have a salary.

6 flags tomorrow with bryanna and the twins! it's already too late to get a good night's sleep, but what else is new?

lastly, i've been having fun with imovie lately, and with all of the footage i have from the spring semester. i've only put together a mormon movie (still have THUD and blocking group clips to sift through), but i'm pretty proud of it: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F_GGqMhDk9c whenever i crop a clip or make the film go faster i like to pretend i'm nikki(1)!! wheeeeeee.

been home a week. it's just as wonderful as i remembered, and i'm loving it just as much as i hoped i would. well, maybe not quite as much - have been studying lots and lots of computer science for an interview in brea on tuesday for a fellowship that would be wonderful to get, except that it starts on june 30th. which would mean that instead of the whole summer with my family that i was expecting (the only real perk to being jobless after graduation), i'd be out the door forever in 15 days. probably not forever, knowing me, but potentially forever. also, who am i to be applying for computer science jobs? what do computer people do all day? code stuff? code what? all of these interviewers ask me what kind of job i am looking for and i have nothing concrete to tell them so i have to come up with things like "interesting and challenging opportunities at innovative companies such as yours" except i stutter a lot when i say it out loud. what is it that i like to do? make cards. write letters. work on perfecting the details of stuff that is really important but actually not really important at all, like zombie musical dvds, im crew subs, spreadsheet formatting, and color-coded t-shirts. let people know that they are important. provide help when it's not extremely necessary but still appreciated. listen to people talk about their passions. learn about other people's passions so they can become my passions too. figure things out. find interesting and awesome details in articles, website, pictures, and people. look things up when i want to know. be sometimes outside and sometimes inside. read clever things and hear worthwhile words. get to know people well. stay up late whether i should or not. play with my dog (maybe this generalizes to spend time with people who are excited to see me). eat foods that are delicious.

to be fair, i do know why i'm looking into computer science - i really did enjoy the classes i took when i was up-to-date on what we were learning, and computer science is the best way to start working with robots. my enthusiasm robots has been the one novel academic(?) realization i've made over the past four years, so i may as well go for it, right?